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Build Up Your Self Confidence by using Simple Fashion & Beauty Tips
You are feeling good about yourself and you want to show the world that you have something to offer. You feel that way inside but you look says something totally different. How to get the outside to match how you feel on the inside? Well you have...
Leather Jewelry - a touch of Forbidden (and Friendship)
Most people will agree that leather jewelry is great. Whether it's a wristband or an ankle bracelet - it has a touch of style. Even though it's often a small detail - it's always very noticeable on anyone who wears it. Short skirts, shorts, bikini,...
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I Love You, But . . .
How cliche and hurtful to hear the phrase "I love you, but I'm
not in love with you". It's a crock. It's a noble attempt for
the speaker to feel good about ending a relationship. They say
this to ease their own pain and to make themselves feel like
they bowed out gracefully. It's bull. There's usually something
else going on and the recipient usually feels a loss and at
fault. You are either loved or you're not. That's the bottom
line. So which is it? The recipient struggles to find out and
enters the darkest of hours searching their heart and soul
trying to find out.
It hurts to hear similar phrases. The recipient feels that there
may be a chance if they are still loved in any fashion. They may
also have found guilt in themselves for many different reasons.
They will rationalize their own behavior and lay the entire
blame on themselves. It's a natural instinct to do so, but it is
so unfair. The recipient will go through many phases of
emotions; hurt, remorse, anger, and the list goes on and on.
This dark moment can disrupt their lives and cause so much harm.
They will go through a period where they can't eat, sleep, and
function properly in their daily activities. Why? They are still
in love.
The emotional roller coaster is relentless. The best advice for
this person who is hurting is to share their thoughts and
feelings with family, friends and trusted co-workers. Don't keep
it bottled up inside. Keeping it to oneself with only intensify
the lasting effects. It's difficult to be strong in such a
situation, and the person hurting can not do it alone. Support
is the best way to easy the pain, even if the person feels like
a failure or embarrassed over the particulars of the failing
relationship.
The most important thing is to go through the emotions. Let it
all hang out, so to speak. Whether in private or among trusted
individuals, just let it out. It's amazing what kind of relief
you can have by sharing your thoughts and true emotions. Break
down and cry. Shout if you want. It doesn't matter. Just get it
out. It's part of the healing stage.
Denial is a natural feeling also, but there will come a time
when true reality kicks in. It's a state of mind. How you vent
that denial or accept it will determine your next
course. It's
also a part of the healing stage or acceptance. There is no
right way or wrong way to do this, but you will come to the
point where anger kicks in.
Don't let thoughts of revenge rule your state of mind. It's so
easy to find ways to seek revenge. It's a natural defense, but
it's not worth it. Remember, you are much better than that.
Don't allow yourself to stoop to a level that you will later
regret. Try your best to be yourself. Don't do anything out of
the norm, whether you have accepted the end of the relationship
or have decided to sit back and see what happens. Be an adult
and one day you will be proud of the way you handled you the
situation.
The one thing you can do is reassure yourself that you did
nothing wrong. Your partner had the obligation of communication.
If something was wrong, they should have spoken up. They would
have done this if they truly 'loved you'. That's not much
consolation in your time of grief, but it's the truth.
If you and your partner can work through this dark moment in
your relationship, then that's a victory that will forever
create a bond that will be so difficult to break. It will prove
to build a stronger relationship than you ever have imagined.
Sometimes it takes a traumatic moment in our lives to acquire a
solid foundation. We make think we have it but the test of time
and life's trials will prove whether or not we can build that
sort of foundation.
It's going to hurt your heart and soul, but if it was meant to
be, it will. Have faith. There is always a purpose in life and
we may never understand it at that the time, but someday we will.
Patience is the worst part. It's a virtue that will pay off in
the end, no matter the outcome of your ordeal, whether you
believe it or not.
The grass is always greener on the other side, and it's natural
to want to purchase a gallon of 'Round-Up' and kill it. Have
patience. Crab grass can grow everywhere but it's the 'weed and
feed' that builds that everlasting strong relationship.
About the author:
Elaine Lemons is an author on a site for Creative Writing (
http://www.Writing.Com/ ). Visit her portfolio at
http://www.writing.com/authors/october2002
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